74. The Meaning of Faith

“Be… gentle. It hurts.”

Clint acted as if he would devour Psyche. Groans involuntarily escaped her lips due to his movements, which were different from usual, as if he intended to leave his mark on every inch of her flesh, from her neck to her shoulders.

“Ah…”

His caressing touch stimulated her senses, sending a surge of tension from head to toe.

“Relax.”

“…”

After pausing briefly to speak softly, Clint kissed her tear-stained eyes, then immediately swallowed her lips.

He didn’t give her a chance to catch her breath.

“Huff, haa…”

For a moment, their lips parted, and she gasped for air.

“Cl-Clint, something’s… different today…”

Without saying a word, Clint kissed her again.

It meant he wouldn’t listen. In his rough hands, Psyche’s body trembled uncontrollably. It was the first time something like this had happened.

“Where did he touch you again?”

“He didn’t…! Ah!”

Clint seemed not to hear her answer at all.

Before she knew it, Psyche was lying on the bed, looking up at Clint looming over her.

And then, there was a time of ecstasy.

❖ ❖ ❖

Psyche looked up at Clint lying in front of her and asked, “Do you… trust me?”

Clint chuckled.

“It seems my wife asks that question often.”

“Me?”

Psyche turned to him with a look of surprise.

“Didn’t you ask the same thing last time?”

“When?”

“Just before we got married.”

It suddenly dawned on Psyche what the conversation before their marriage was about.

The beginning of the forgotten conversation after drafting the contract.

“What if we hurt each other, even though we’re in a contractual relationship?”

At the time, she couldn’t fully trust him. Moreover, she felt like the weaker one in this relationship, so she turned the question back on him, wondering if he would discard her once the contract was over.

The Duke had smiled slyly and said, “Don’t worry. Even if my wife hurts me, she won’t leave me first.”

She found his answer a bit strange. Why did he think she would hurt him? It was clear that he held the upper hand in the relationship.

“Do you trust me?”

Ah, that’s why she had asked like that.

Suddenly, Clint’s declaration of trust seemed unbelievable to her.

Not even long since they met.

And they were only bound by a contractual relationship. The notion of trusting each other seemed so unrealistic that Psyche recalled laughing at it.

So, Psyche looked at Clint again and asked, “Do you still trust me?”

“Is it important for you if I trust my wife?”

Psyche didn’t know how to respond to that question.

If he said he trusted her… It would feel like a lie considering what they had been through. And if he said he didn’t trust her… That would be hurtful in its own right.

As Psyche pondered, she was surprised once again.

The feeling of being hurt didn’t seem to fit between them.

Had she given her heart to him again? She had sworn not to harbor any expectations or trust.

Psyche made an effort to push away such emotions and spoke again.

“That’s not it! It’s just… You didn’t ask me about that… That, the situation with the prince…”

Psyche found it very odd.

If it were her, she would have covered it up and started doubting immediately. If Clint were to be with another woman…

The thought was unsettling.

“Ah, maybe because we’re in a contractual relationship, so you don’t ask about such things?”

That explanation made sense to her.

If their relationship wasn’t about emotions like affection or love, then there was no need to trust, so there was no room for doubt…

But at the same time, she remembered Clint’s expression as he looked at her and the prince. That expression… wasn’t that of someone who had come to find a contractual partner out of necessity.

Psyche was thoroughly confused.

She felt the same strange sensation she had felt in the carriage earlier…

A strange illusion as if he really did like her.

So, she spoke again.

“You won’t leave me…”

Psyche felt a little strange saying that.

Clint hesitated slightly before speaking again.

His hesitation wasn’t a sign of denial but rather a desire to choose his words carefully.

But Psyche’s mind was filled with strange thoughts.

What if what she heard wasn’t true, and what she saw wasn’t real?

In that case…

‘If that woman has a child, We’ll have to kill it.’

Perhaps those words from the past.

With that thought in mind, Psyche cautiously continued.

“If I bear the Duke’s child, doesn’t our contract end?”

Clint’s expression subtly changed at the mention of the contract ending.

Psyche hoped desperately that her belief that he wanted to kill her was just a misunderstanding as she continued.

“If I have a child, can’t you give me freedom?”

“…”

“I want to leave the dukedom and live freely.”

It was a kind of gamble.

She thought if he had no intention of killing her, he would easily let her go, so she threw out the words.

But Clint’s face was very serious.

And he said,

“Absolutely not.”

He firmly rejected her proposal.

Psyche was caught in a very strange, inexplicable emotion.

❖ ❖ ❖

As the afternoon approached, her mind became even more complicated.

Psyche sat quietly, pondering over their morning conversation.

It was strange.

There was nothing consistent about the words of a man who had resolved to kill her.

If he had intended to kill her, he shouldn’t have shown such an expression in front of the prince and her.

A man who said he would kill her, who couldn’t hide his affectionate face, and who said he wouldn’t leave, yet also made sure she couldn’t leave…

Emotions were supposed to stem from a single core.

He seemed like a misaligned gear, lacking any properly meshed emotions.

If he truly trusted her…

She had decided not to trust him.

Should she just think of it as acting?

In her confusion, a sigh escaped her.

“Lady, shall I bring up the tea you usually have?”

Realizing she had forgotten to take her birth control pill, Psyche quickly asked for the tea.

But strangely enough, the tea she had prepared for today ran out.

“Just for a day…”

Psyche thought she could just resume taking it from tomorrow and decided to just drink the tea for today.

Alexa, who had been watching her from the side, asked, “It seems like you and the Duke are getting along well these days.”

“Really?”

Alexa smiled brightly, looking pleased with herself.

Psyche, too, put down her cup of tea and gave a faint smile.

There was no need for subordinates to suffer in the conflict between the two.

If their relationship appeared good to others and made everyone else comfortable, that would be fine.

She stopped thinking any further.

Then she brought the cup to her lips to finish her tea.

“Why hasn’t the child come yet?”

“Oh!”

“Oh, my lady!”

Startled by Alexa’s words, Psyche spit out the tea.

Alexa quickly approached and wiped around her.

“I’m sorry. I spoke out of turn…”

Since everyone knew that Clint placed great importance on succession, many found it strange that they didn’t have a child.

They appeared quite close on the surface.

Even to Alexa, they seemed to spend a fair amount of time together.

Since Psyche didn’t know about taking birth control pills, she could say such things.

Startled, Psyche raised her voice in embarrassment.

“A child… It’s not something that easily happens!”

❖ ❖ ❖

Clint stopped in his tracks, inadvertently trying to enter Psyche’s room, at the sound coming from inside.

A baby.

If a baby were to come, the contract would end. Then, the pretext for keeping her would disappear.

He had hoped for the baby’s arrival, but now, at the thought of Psyche possibly leaving, his mood quickly sank.

She had mentioned wanting freedom just yesterday, after all.

“It’s just a contract, though…”

Clint turned back, thinking that he might be investing too much of his heart into Psyche.

On his way to the study, he spotted Alejandro hurrying towards him.

After confirming Clint’s presence, Alejandro quickly approached, saluted, and immediately began to speak.

“Your Highness, your concern was valid.”

“Concern?”

“Yes, about last time, when the Queen of Tarahn stayed. It seems the Duchess had been wandering around where the Empress was staying.”

“What?”

“It seems she had been searching around there… and took something. Our men took some time to find it again. It seems to be the Duchess’s belonging.”

Alejandro handed Clint a tightly sealed small leather pouch.

“It seems to be a combination of herbs…”

Clint accepted it.

It was what Psyche had been consuming instead of her birth control pills.