Sencha Replica - Side Story 22

Side Story 22

The gloves I threw to hit Cha Gweonwoo bounced off without hitting his body, struck my forehead, and fell to the floor. It didn’t hurt, but my pride was wounded.

Cha Gweonwoo looked dumbfounded, like someone who had been suddenly kicked by a sleeping dog. From his perspective, I had watched him practice without saying anything, and when he asked if I had watched, I suddenly got irritable. He probably couldn’t understand my behavior right now.

It’s the pot calling the kettle black. But what can I do if I’m angry? I turned my back on him ostentatiously.

Is love supposed to make people so childish? Even my parents, who acted like they couldn’t live without each other, sometimes fought over childish reasons that even I could see as a kid. My mom would say “He’s so handsome” while watching TV, and an argument would start. “What’s handsome about him? I’m more handsome,” my dad would say.

When I was young, I wondered why my parents fought over such things, but now I understand my dad’s feelings. He loves mom, so of course he’d be upset if she called another man handsome! Moreover, she’s not even looking at the person sitting right next to her, just watching TV!

I’ve been taught since childhood that feelings shouldn’t dictate behavior, but I wanted to show Cha Gweonwoo with all my might that I was really angry. While I didn’t want to reveal my pettiness, part of me hoped Cha Gweonwoo would discover my petty heart.

Yes! I’m petty! Very petty! I’m the world champion of pettiness!

Thump thump thump. I walked, stomping the floor with my feet. Walking like this hurts my knees. Whatever. I just walked recklessly according to my mood.

Hey, didn’t he tell me not to whisper in his ear? Saying it looks like we’re kissing? And then he goes and what? “Come watch me again tomorrow”? If that’s not a love confession, what is it? Saying “Let’s meet tomorrow”, “Let’s meet every day”, if that’s not love, what is it? Even if that wasn’t his intention, that’s exactly how it sounded to me!

If Cha Gweonwoo really thought I was kissing when I was whispering in his ear, if he had such a misunderstanding, he handled it very maturely then. He smoothly diffused the situation so I wouldn’t feel bad, and he opened up about his own feelings very well.

I want to do that too, but I can’t!

Jealousy is controlling my body. I feel like rolling down these stairs with my body, but I’m barely holding back. Because in the end, I’d be the only one getting hurt.

“Kim Doweon!”

Cha Gweonwoo called my name belatedly and chased after me. I pretended not to hear and kept walking.

“Doweon-ah!”

But Cha Gweonwoo quickly caught up to me and grabbed my arm to turn me around. I opened my eyes sulkily.

It seemed like Cha Gweonwoo wanted to ask me why on earth I was acting like this, but I could tell from his trembling lips that he was hesitating, afraid of upsetting me further.

I shook off the arm that was holding me. I’m not in the mood to talk to Cha Gweonwoo right now. I don’t want to say anything, and I don’t want to see his face.

But I didn’t get far before Cha Gweonwoo caught me again.

“Is it because I asked if you came to watch the training?”

Afraid I might leave again, Cha Gweonwoo hurriedly asked as he turned me around. That’s not the reason.

“I really just asked because you were here. I was just curious why you were here. I didn’t mean anything else.”

He rambles incoherently, as if he’s forgotten how to speak properly when he usually speaks well. It seemed he really didn’t understand why I was acting like this. I grasped his hand that was tightly holding my padded jacket and gently pushed it away. As his hand fell away due to my will, Cha Gweonwoo’s face turned pale.

Well, if you think about it, maybe Cha Gweonwoo didn’t do anything wrong. Leaving Cha Gweonwoo, who looked busy trying to recall his memories, I grabbed the door and opened it. I should have just opened the door and walked out coolly, but in that moment, the cold wind from outside slapped my cheeks, making me hesitate unconsciously. Startled, I closed the door again and came back inside.

Wait, it’s really too cold!

As I stood still in front of the door, unable to go out, Cha Gweonwoo quietly took the scarf I was holding. He wrapped the scarf around my neck. I don’t want to! I don’t want to do this! I wanted to unravel everything, but I stayed still because it was cold.

Cha Gweonwoo, who had been watching my reaction, gently turned my body around. Then, with efficient movements, he neatly wrapped the scarf around my neck and zipped up my padded jacket all the way to my neck.

I defiantly pulled down the zipper he had pulled up to my neck. He zipped it up again, and I pulled it down again. After rebelling like this a few times, Cha Gweonwoo pressed his body against mine, seeming frustrated.

“Doweon-ah, look at hyung.”

And he lowered his head to meet my eyes. Why should I look at him? Why does he want me to look at his face at a time like this? I desperately tried to avoid his eyes, but at some point, I lost my words at the handsome face that filled my vision.

See? Look at him using his good looks like this.

I thought he only used this on me, but now he’s using it everywhere. I thought this hyung didn’t know how handsome he was, but he knows it all. So he’s using it to steal the hearts of his juniors. When I’m not around.

A switch flipped in my mind.

“Do you like it? Being handsome?”

Let me go. I need to speak. I need to vent these stifling feelings. I won’t be able to sleep tonight if I keep this bottled up.

Cha Gweonwoo just frowned at my words, unable to give any answer. I grabbed his collar with my hand, as if possessed by a gangster.

“I asked if you like it! Being handsome!”

Answer me!

“Is that why you act so cold usually? Do you deliberately act tough and prickly? Because when you act a little kind, everyone falls for you? Huh? Did you deliberately create this concept because everyone falls for you?”

“…”

“Do you like it when people like you just because you act a little kind? Do you like it?”

I brushed off his attempt to hug me, not knowing what else to do. Now is not the time for hugs. I’m very angry right now and can’t see straight.

Even though I’m telling him this, he doesn’t understand at all and is just hoping I’ll explain more. I want to explain calmly so he can understand, but I’m too excited and my words are getting tangled.

“Why are you so kind to your ju-! Why are you so kind to your junior?”

While Cha Gweonwoo couldn’t give any answer, my delusions spread in my mind like paint. Before I knew it, I had imagined that Cha Gweonwoo had gradually cooled towards me and fallen in love with a junior he liked, and to date that junior every day, he prevented me from coming to the training ground, but because I came to watch the training without notice today, I caught them just as they were about to go on a date, so he was surprised and flustered like this…

“Why do you tell your junior to come watch again tomorrow?”

For a moment, Cha Gweonwoo’s mouth opened in a circle. At the same time, my reason let go of its restraints. What is it? This expression like you’ve been caught, what have you been caught doing?

“I’m asking why you tell your junior to come watch again tomorrow! You don’t do that with me! You always tell me not to come! You always tell me not to come watch! You tell me to come when it’s all over!”

“…”

“So I always wait at home and come when it’s over, so why do you tell your junior ‘Come watch again tomorrow’? Why do you say this? Why do you do this?”

“…”

“That junior watches you train the whole time and even draws pictures, saying they want to be your umbrella and stuff, so why do you tell a junior like that ‘Come watch again tomorrow’? Why do you say things like that?”

Cha Gweonwoo said something to me, but I couldn’t hear anything. It felt like my ears were completely blocked.

It had been a long time since I’d been this angry. I’ve lived my life rarely getting angry, but Cha Gweonwoo keeps making me angry. In this world, only Cha Gweonwoo, whom I love, keeps making me angry.

“You don’t even let me watch your training! I’m leaving like a guilty person after seeing you finish, and yet…!”

Suddenly short of breath, I paused speaking and took deep breaths, my shoulders heaving.

“You tell your junior to come watch again tomorrow! While I… while I was hiding and hearing that!”

“…”

“I’m really… I’m so hurt by you!”

“…”

“I’m really so hurt… damn.”

The moment I voiced the word “hurt” that had been floating in my mind, I truly felt hurt. My heart ached as if a fierce winter wind had blown in. My throat hurt and felt tight, as if someone had grabbed the nape of my neck with long nails. At the same time, my eyes burned hot.

That’s right.

I was so, so, so, so, so hurt. I felt so, so, so, so, so, so wronged. Almost to the point of tears.

The fact that your junior can go watch your training every day because they’re your junior. Of course they can watch Cha Gweonwoo’s training because they’re a junior. Of course they should watch Cha Gweonwoo’s training. But I couldn’t help feeling envious and jealous.

Because that friend ostentatiously had what I couldn’t have.