I've Been Possessed, But What If I Get Pregnant First? - C88
#88
The happier I was, the more I couldn’t erase the thought that I was stealing someone else’s life. The thought that I should return all of this to the original Cha Yuwon and the thought that I wanted to be loved a little longer as Cha Yuwon here collided inside me.
“By ‘here’, do you mean this house, or something else?”
I pressed my lips tight at the penetrating question. I couldn’t talk about this. Avoiding Yoon Seolah’s gaze, I thought for a long time and barely answered.
“I- I just don’t want to talk about this anymore… I’m sorry.”
I deliberately flipped through the workbook busily. I put force in my eyes as tears were about to come out. It felt like all the facts would surface and be discovered by Kwon Taebeom. I had to return everything, but at the thought of not being able to see Kwon Taebeom and Ho-ppang in the future, I couldn’t muster the courage. At the same time, I hated myself for being this selfish and felt like dying from feeling sorry to everyone.
Yoon Seolah, who was quietly watching me, made a regretful face and nodded.
“Okay… When Mr. Yuwon wants to talk about it. Let’s talk then.”
The lesson started, but I couldn’t focus. From earlier, my heart was pounding as if it would burst, so I grew anxious that she might hear this sound. My anxiously beating heart, all my senses, seemed to be telling me that this peace wouldn’t last much longer.
Where is the end for me and Kwon Taebeom? How will this world flow from now on? Where did the real Cha Yuwon go? Everything was just confusing. I felt like I was dropped alone in a vast ocean with nothing in sight.
***
“Did you do well today?”
“Yes…”
As soon as the lesson ended, Kwon Taebeom came inside. At his touch carefully examining my face, tears suddenly burst out.
He’s such a kind person. To the point where I regretted being afraid of him at first, Kwon Taebeom was truly a warm person. The guilt of deceiving him overwhelmed me.
Kwon Taebeom quietly hugged me, patting my back as I bit my lips and sobbed, trying not to make a sound.
“…Okay, Yuwon. You don’t have to do it. You can stop now.”
That’s not it. It wasn’t a problem of Kwon Taebeom misunderstanding. More than it being difficult and scary to meet people, it was too hard that I was deceiving him and everyone else.
‘I’m not actually Cha Yuwon…’
I looked up at him, inwardly spitting out the words I couldn’t utter. His face looked much more haggard than when we first met. I felt like Kwon Taebeom, who should live a brighter and happier life than anyone else, lost his light because of me.
“I’ll always be by your side, so don’t worry, Yuwon.”
“Hic… sob, ugh, huu…”
“I’m sorry. It’s all my fault, Yuwon.”
Kwon Taebeom’s touch wiping my eyes was heartrending. My heart welled up as I faced his eyes tainted with guilt.
‘That’s not it, Taebeom… I’m, I’m the problem.’
I tightly held one of his hands caressing my cheek. Closing my eyes and regulating my breathing, my mind calmly settled down. What I had to do from now on started to vividly take shape in my head.
For his sake, and for Ho-ppang and my sake too, I had to find out. What Cha Yuwon’s past was. What happened between Cha Yuwon and Kwon Taebeom.
And why I possessed this novel.
***
“Taebeom, wake up!”
I forcibly opened Kwon Taebeom’s eyes as he was quietly sleeping and woke him up. He looked at me with eyes that were bigger than usual, startled, and I asked him,
“Were you really surprised?”
“Yuwon?”
“Oh no. There’s a nail mark.”
Using too much force, a small crescent-shaped mark was clearly left under Kwon Taebeom’s eye. Feeling sorry, I rubbed the mark and blew on it, going ho-.
“Don’t worry, it’s gone now!”
But from rubbing too much, the skin under one eye was slightly red. Pretending it was nothing, I gave him a smooch on the lips.
“Then get ready and come out quickly!”
His face still looking up at me in a daze was cute. The hair slightly sticking out from being pressed against the pillow was super cute too.
I secretly took a photo of his back as he headed to the bathroom at my urging, then quickly left the bedroom. While Kwon Taebeom was washing up, I headed to the kitchen to set the birthday table. The surprise I prepared without Kwon Taebeom knowing was left.
“Mr. Yuwon, here.”
“Ah, thank you!”
I received the mask the chef handed me. Actually, my morning sickness was over now, so I didn’t gag even if I smelled food, but I wore the mask considering the effort he prepared.
“What should I do now?”
“Write what you want to say on top of this.”
“Okay, I’ll give it a try.”
I grabbed the chocolate pen the chef handed me and painstakingly wrote letter by letter. My arm was trembling and I failed to control my strength, so the letters were a total mess, but it seemed readable at least. The chef nodded and gave a thumbs up.
“I’ll clean up, so Mr. Yuwon can go rest.”
“Can I really do that?”
“Of course. Now, go on.”
At the chef’s urging hand on my back, I pretended to lose and sat at the table. Anyone could now tell I was pregnant with how much my belly swelled. It was amazing how my belly could be this big even though it wasn’t twins. According to the doctor, the babies of male omega originally show a rapid growth rate from 20 weeks, so I guess it was really true.
Ho-ppang growing bigger by the day made me proud, but it was hard because my legs and lower back hurt just from standing a little. I was tapping my lower back when I heard the sound of Kwon Taebeom coming down.
“Chef!”
“Yes, I’m here!”
Sprinkling powdered sugar as the finishing touch and placing the cake in the center of the table, it looked quite decent.
In the meantime, with the urgency and shock of that day, I just let Kwon Taebeom’s birthday pass like that, and it weighed on my mind. So even if it was late, I wanted to do this for him and asked the chef for a favor.
I checked if I was wearing the party hat well, feeling the top of my head, and picked up the party popper placed on the table. And when Kwon Taebeom entered the kitchen, I pulled the string hanging from the end of the popper.
Pop-
Colorful paper ribbons fell over Kwon Taebeom’s black hair. I gave a slightly strange birthday congratulation.
“Taebeom, happy belated birth- whoa!”
My feet slightly lifted off the floor at the sudden force of him picking me up. My heart pounded so much from the surprise that I tightly hugged his neck.
“Cha Yuwon.”
“You startled me.”
I spoke to Kwon Taebeom while rubbing my belly with a smile. Kwon Taebeom kissed all over my face, then pulled my hand and headed to the table.
“What is all this?”
“It’s a birthday meal! Taebeom, because of me that day, um… anyway, it’s late but I wanted to do this for you.”
It was almost an unspoken agreement between us not to talk about what happened that day, so I hurriedly glossed over it and laughed softly. Sitting down, I placed a pumpkin pancake on top of Kwon Taebeom’s rice.
“Hurry and eat, Taebeom.”
“I’ll enjoy it.”
The corners of Kwon Taebeom’s eyes curved as I called him playfully. How long had it been since we smiled at each other like this? The much thinner Kwon Taebeom felt pitiful again.
“Is the seasoning okay? Is it not too bland?”
“It’s perfect.”
“I made this! I did everything myself without any help from the chef.”
The size was uneven and crooked, but as long as it tasted good, it was fine. There were many more delicious side dishes, but Kwon Taebeom picked up the pumpkin pancake I made several times to eat.
After finishing the meal, we came to the living room and ate fruit. Cherries were in season these days, and the large, sweet and sour ones suited my taste well. Sitting between his legs with a round bowl in my arms, eating fruit, Kwon Taebeom wiped the fabric of my clothes that got fruit juice on it.
“Shall we go to the hospital around 2 o’clock?”
“The hospital?”
“We have to go see Ho-ppang.”
“Ah… um… I don’t think we need to go today.”
Kwon Taebeom looked at me with a puzzled face. I, who had been nagging about the hospital every morning, belatedly came to mind. Lowering my head feeling embarrassed, I felt fetal movement just then. I grabbed Kwon Taebeom’s hand and placed it on my belly.
“He’s kicking hard, saying he ate fruit. I think our Ho-ppang is in a good mood.”
I could see Ho-ppang moving actively enough to make my belly bulge. Kwon Taebeom must have thought I would say let’s go to the hospital today too, since I went to the hospital every day, sometimes even three times a day.
“I’m really okay.”
I knew well what Kwon Taebeom was worried about. But I couldn’t waste time anymore because of that incident. I didn’t have time to feel tired and sad about such things now.
I just needed to quickly find the clue to these hazy memories, resolve the issue, and live a stable life.
As I tightly held his hardened fingertips, I noticed his face filled with visible relief. Kissing his cheek, I made a firm resolution inwardly.
***
After eating a late breakfast and lunch, Kwon Taebeom and I headed to Father’s main house. When I said I wanted to see Father, Kwon Taebeom didn’t seem to like the idea, but he couldn’t object to me saying I wanted to go out after several days.
Unexpectedly, Father’s house was quite a distance from Uneondong. After passing through a large gate no less than our house, a palace-like mansion revealed itself.