I've Been Possessed, But What If I Get Pregnant First? - C38
#38
Sigh…. My fate has become twisted in more ways than one because of what happened that day. I closed my eyes tight and covered my face, and the doctor asked with a concerned voice:
“Mr. Cha Yuwon, you said you’re still unmarried, right?”
I hung my head low and nodded slightly. Marriage, as if… When the female lead could appear at any time. Thinking that way made me choke up with emotion. I bit my lip hard, trying to hold back tears, but my body trembled. As if she expected this, the doctor sighed and took my hand.
“Do you know who the baby’s father is?”
Since I was 8 weeks pregnant, the only one I could remember was Taebeom Kwon, so there was a 200% chance he was the child’s father. I hesitantly looked at the doctor.
“But… I’m not in a situation where I can have the baby right now….”
Forget having it, I couldn’t even tell Taebeom. I grabbed the hem of my clothes tightly and hung my head. If I had known this wasn’t a dream, I wouldn’t have made that choice. Why on earth did this happen… Tears welled up at the thought of ending up like this from a momentary decision. The doctor pondered for a moment, then opened her desk drawer and handed me something.
“Then it seems you have two options, Mr. Cha.”
I took the pamphlet she handed me with shaking hands, and the large text stating “Informed Consent for Pregnancy Termination Surgery” caught my eye.
A- Abortion…?
I flinched in surprise and pulled my hand away from the pamphlet. The doctor handed me something else with her other hand.
“The remaining option is an application for an unwed mother and father support center. Legally, the deadline for abortion is 15 weeks of pregnancy.”
Unwed father…. Could I really raise this child well on my own? But still, abortion is….
Documentary footage I had seen in the past about abortion filled my head. The doctor sitting across from me firmly placed the pamphlet in my hand and spoke in a resolute voice.
“Think it over carefully during the time you have left. Whether you will keep this baby or give it up.”
I left the exam room with a blank face and sat down on the emergency staircase.
“This is insane….”
Not only did I thoughtlessly spend a night with Taebeom in someone else’s body, I went and got pregnant. I committed this tremendous deed in a situation where I don’t know when I’ll return to my original world. If I could, I wanted to go back to the past and hide completely out of Taebeom’s sight.
“…Sigh.”
Feeling at a loss facing this difficult reality, I covered my face and thought of Taebeom. Him who was still in Hong Kong, and the female lead Yoon Seolah living there. I’m not sure how closely this world will follow the original story, but I needed to consider the possibilities.
“If Taebeom… falls for Yoon Seolah, then I’m really done for.”
If that happens, he definitely won’t leave me alone after getting pregnant with his child. He was a man with no blood or tears when it came to Yoon Seolah. I looked down at the pamphlet the doctor had given me and bit my lip hard. Either have the baby on my own or get rid of it… I was at a crossroads.
“Ah…”
Just then, I felt a poking pain in my lower abdomen and that unfamiliar sensation again. I used to think it was a parasite, but now I knew there was a baby inside. I set the pamphlet on the floor and gently rubbed my belly with a cautious hand.
“I’m sorry… For worrying about this as soon as I found out about you….”
It’s not like you wanted to come into existence either. I sighed again with complicated feelings, thinking of the child in my womb.
***
I got in the car waiting in front of the academy building right on time. Secretary Junseok, who got out and even carried my bag for me, handed me a warm citron tea.
“Mr. Yuwon, good work again today.”
“Thank you.”
I couldn’t bring myself to meet eyes with Secretary Junseok, who was watching me through the rear-view mirror. I gave a half-hearted greeting and turned my gaze to look out the window. After finding out I was pregnant, I couldn’t focus at all during class at the academy. When the break time bell rang and I came to my senses, I saw I was still on the first page I had opened to and just walked out of the academy without notice.
I walked around aimlessly, thinking and thinking some more. At times I suddenly made up my mind to give up the baby right away, but whenever my stomach throbbed, it felt like the baby was signaling me not to forget it, making me reconsider.
After walking around all day doing a lot of thinking like that, the conclusion I reached was right back where I started. The scenery outside the window flowed by faster and faster. I stared at it blankly for a while, then closed my eyes at the surging feeling of unease.
***
Junseok left the room after making sure Yuwon, who seemed particularly low on energy today, fell asleep. And he lowered his voice and put his cell phone to his ear to answer Taebeom’s call that came at the perfect time.
“Yes, hyung-nim.”
-How’s Yuwon?
“He just fell asleep.”
-Report.
Junseok told Taebeom on the other end of the call about what happened with Yuwon today.
“As I sent you in the file earlier, he had an appointment at ‘Han Junghee Internal Medicine Clinic’ on the 6th floor of the same building as the academy around 12:42pm, but I haven’t been able to figure out what it was about yet. I apologize.”
Since that incident, they had greatly reduced the personnel tailing Yuwon, but not completely eliminated them. They still hadn’t located that bastard’s whereabouts, and it seemed Taebeom had no intention of doing so either.
-Find out what it was about.
“Yes, understood.”
Junseok recalled the doctor’s stern-looking face, but silently acknowledged the order.
-Also, we’ll be leaving early Sunday morning.
“Didn’t you have plans until the evening?”
-I cancelled them.
“Excuse me?”
Junseok furrowed his brow, remembering Taebeom’s dinner appointment with the powerful businessman Chairman Lee Chen in Hong Kong on Friday evening. It wasn’t urgent, but he had worked so hard to set up the get-together while in Hong Kong to discuss future business expansion.
Junseok could sense that the reason Taebeom cancelled his plans was because of Yuwon. It’s not that he didn’t understand Taebeom’s feelings, but…. As Junseok was rubbing his tired eyes, Taebeom spoke.
-And prepare one room in the annex.
“For what purpose, may I ask?”
-Something came up and I need to bring someone. I think it’s best if Yuwon doesn’t know for now, so make it as far from the main building as possible.
“Yes, I understand.”
Junseok reported the rest to Taebeom, including about Yuwon. He told Taebeom about Yuwon’s every move – what and how much he ate today, where he wandered around to after leaving the academy, etc. Even though he had probably already received the files and roughly knew the contents, Taebeom meticulously asked as if hearing it for the first time, making Junseok realize an alpha’s possessiveness once again.
“Ah, hyung-nim. Your rut is coming up soon, isn’t it?”
Come to think of it, Taebeom’s rut wasn’t far off. He could probably get through this rut with suppressants like before, but now that he had brought Yuwon home, there was a chance they would spend it together, so he asked Taebeom.
“Are you planning to use suppressants to get through it this time as well?”
-Yeah. And book a hotel this time, while we’re on the subject.
“Understood.”
It seemed he would use suppressants for this rut despite having a lover. Judging by how he told him to prepare a separate place for Yuwon’s sake, who was an omega, Junseok was certain Taebeom had no intention of being together with him. After hanging up, Junseok rubbed his aching sides, lamenting his situation of not being able to get off work until after 10pm.
“Sigh… Should I quit?”
He pointlessly rubbed his chilled ribs while gazing at the fluttering leaves.
***
“Mr. Yuwon, is it not to your liking?”
“Oh… no, it’s delicious. Thank you.”
After finding out about the baby, I tried to force myself to eat. Everything else was so revolting that even water was hard to swallow, but porridge made from white rice was at least edible if I plugged my nose.
“It’s a big problem that you can hardly eat. Should we stop by the hospital?”
“Pweh- N- No! No way! I’m really fine.”
I desperately waved the hand I had firmly covering my nose at Secretary Junseok’s sudden suggestion to go to the hospital. If I went to the hospital with him, there was a 99.999% chance Taebeom would find out I was pregnant. I hadn’t sorted out my thoughts yet. I didn’t want him finding out like this.
“Alright. But if something is going on, you have to let me know. Hyung-nim entrusted you to me before he left.”
“Okay….”
‘I’m pregnant, Mr. Secretary….’
I could only say it in my mind, not out loud. I tried to eat however I could, but feeling nauseated and having no appetite, I barely managed three spoonfuls and filled the rest of my stomach with fruit. I devoured a whole mango and 1/4 of a melon without getting up, but then I thought of the cake in the fridge.
The strawberry cake with huge strawberries embedded throughout was a cake Secretary Junseok specially bought for me this morning from H Hotel. But the doctor had told me to be careful of my sugar levels after I said I mainly ate snacks and fruit instead of meals, so I was trying to control it.
Still, she said eating fruit was better than eating nothing at all, so I did eat it, but I thought eating cake on top of that would be too bad for the baby.
‘But you, this child. Will you really give birth to it…?’
I was still of two minds. I didn’t know for sure when I would return either, and I wasn’t confident how Taebeom would react if I told him I was pregnant. I could trust him now, but the Taebeom in the novel was the epitome of an obsessive jerk.
Sometimes that side of him showed clearly too. Plus, the two of them might have already met by now for all I knew. I rubbed my eyes, sore from lack of deep sleep, and stuffed the notebook with my many worries scribbled in it under the bed mattress.