If You Want Me - Episode 13
<Episode 13>
Korea, returned after a long flight.
Although there was no big difference between airports in the United States and Korea, the fact that most people at the airport were Korean made Seon-won feel an inexplicable sense of relief and comfort.
Seon-won waited in front of the baggage carousel with wide eyes, waiting for his suitcase to arrive.
After a while, Seon-won’s suitcase appeared on the conveyor belt. As he happily went to retrieve it, Secretary Bae, who had already received his suitcase and was waiting, discreetly approached Seon-won.
“Um, Seon-won…”
Although Seon-won and Secretary Bae spent a lot of time together and occasionally chatted, it was unusual for him to approach so secretively like this.
Seon-won tilted his head in puzzlement at his behavior.
“Yes?”
“Did you perhaps…have a fight with the Vice President?”
“Ah…”
Seon-won let out a small sigh at Secretary Bae’s discreet question. Since they didn’t converse much normally, Seon-won thought there was no big difference, but it seemed Secretary Bae noticed the change.
Seon-won and Do-gyeom didn’t have any particular conversation from the United States back to Korea.
Despite having spent countless nights together, ruts and heat cycles had different meanings for the two of them. Not because one was almost impregnated and they nearly broke their partner contract, but because during those times they completely lost their rationality and became raw beings.
Seon-won didn’t know how Do-gyeom thought about it, but he found it extremely embarrassing and shameful. Do-gyeom may have felt the same since he also went into rut, but Seon-won didn’t. Because he loved Do-gyeom, he could love him no matter what state he was in, but perhaps Do-gyeom didn’t feel the same way.
Could it be that was why he wanted to end their partnership?
Putting aside violating the contract, was it because that appearance was too unsightly for him….. So he wanted to quit?
If he completely lost affection from that beastly appearance, and thus deemed he could no longer continue their partner relationship…..
As Seon-won’s face instantly paled, Secretary Bae looked alarmed and embraced him, supporting his back.
“No, Seon-won. Are you in pain somewhere?”
“Ah, no. I’m okay. We didn’t fight either…”
“Really? Ah…. Then why is the Vice President acting like that?”
When Seon-won tried to put on a composed expression saying he wasn’t in pain, Secretary Bae looked relieved but also bewildered.
“He’s usually sensitive, but today even more so…”
“What are you doing over there.”
“Oh, Vice President…”
Secretary Bae started to appeal to Seon-won in exasperation but suddenly froze with a stiff smile at the stern voice coming from behind.
Speak of the devil…. Do-gyeom was staring at Seon-won and Secretary Bae with a stiff, frozen expression.
For a moment, he silently alternated cold gazes between Seon-won and Secretary Bae. With Seon-won’s poor complexion, Secretary Bae supporting him made them look quite close.
“Yoon Seon-won. Come here.”
“….”
Do-gyeom hadn’t said a single word to Seon-won during the long flight back, but now he was suddenly calling him like a dog.
Just thinking of his arrogant tone made Seon-won not want to go to his side, but he had just been worried that Do-gyeom had completely lost affection for him after seeing his appearance during the heat cycle.
So foolishly, he felt relieved that Do-gyeom was calling for him at all. As Seon-won left Secretary Bae’s side and approached Do-gyeom, he neatly fixed Seon-won’s disheveled bangs and said:
“Don’t do anything reckless and go straight home. If you need to go to the hospital, I’ll send a car so let me know.”
“….”
What reckless thing…? And why was he suddenly mentioning the hospital?
Like Secretary Bae, it seemed Do-gyeom had noticed his poor complexion as well, but Seon-won wondered if he was telling him to go to the obstetrics department instead.
Although he had taken the morning-after pill Do-gyeom provided, the probability of pregnancy was lower than using condoms or taking contraceptives in advance. So maybe he was telling Seon-won not to miss even the slightest possibility and to go to the hospital.
Thinking that way felt bitter, but that was the extent of their relationship. Seon-won gave up any expectations and nodded slightly.
“I’ll do that.”
“….”
At Seon-won’s obedient reply, Do-gyeom looked down at him with an indecipherable expression, but didn’t say anything more.
* * *
“Haaa…..”
After returning home from the airport, Seon-won immediately flopped down on the bed.
He wished he could just fall soundly asleep, but barely remembered he had something to do first and reluctantly got up.
“Ah, I need to take my medicine…”
On the way home earlier, he suddenly got muscle aches, nausea, and even a low-grade fever. He felt so dizzy and sick that he thought he might collapse while just walking down the street.
Since he had just returned from overseas, he went to the pharmacy in case he had caught some illness. But after listening to his explanation, the pharmacist asked him an unexpected question.
– Are you perhaps an omega?
– Yes? Yes, that’s right…
– Then did you perhaps recently experience your first heat cycle with a rut partner?
– Um…yes.
He only expected issues from being overseas, so he was a bit flustered when suddenly asked about intimacy.
As Seon-won answered with an embarrassed look, the pharmacist responded impassively, as if many people came for this reason.
– Ah. Then that’s why you’re in pain. The pheromones have a big impact during that period. Especially if you were knotted.
– Ah…. But I was actually fine at the time, and only started feeling unwell today after returning from the US?
– Yes, that sometimes happens too. You know how you don’t feel pain when tense, but then it suddenly hits you hard? I’ll give you a week’s worth of medicine, but if you keep feeling sick after taking it, then you should go to the hospital.
The pharmacist then explained how to take the medicine.
He said it could be taken on an empty stomach. Recalling the pharmacist’s instructions, Seon-won shuffled to the kitchen and poured himself a glass of water. Following the dosage, he swallowed two pills at once with the water.
Gulp gulp…..
“Haaa…..”
Setting down the glass, Seon-won wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and let out a sigh. Since the medicine wouldn’t take effect right away, he wanted to lie back down from the distress.
But feeling he shouldn’t lie down immediately after taking it, Seon-won sat on a dining chair and hugged his knees.
“Why does everything ache so much…?”
This was the first time experiencing this, so he never imagined he would be ailing alone like this. As he rested his head on his knees with a small grumble, he suddenly felt indignant.
Even amidst the heat cycle where all his senses were consumed by pleasure, Do-gyeom’s knotting had felt painful. It was difficult to endure that, and now he had to suffer this sickness too…
Moreover, others did it hoping to get pregnant, but Seon-won had to take a morning-after pill. If they were lovers, the alpha partner would have nursed him during such a trying time, but he had no one to look after him.
The heat cycle, Do-gyeom’s rut, the knotting… it had all come unexpectedly, unplanned, so it couldn’t be helped, but…
“I’m getting tired of this too…”
Continuing this unrequited love. Having to take a morning-after pill despite the chance of his loved one’s child. Having to suffer alone like this.
Almost every day he wondered, ‘Should I keep being his partner?’ But today he felt so distressed and drained that he was overcome with a sense of self-pity.
After a short contemplation, Seon-won wiped away tears from the corners of his eyes with his knee. A few tears fell because loving Do-gyeom always seemed to only bring pain.
* * *
“Ugh……”
Seon-won groaned and tossed in bed.
The illness that started the day he returned to Korea persisted in tormenting him relentlessly. Despite taking medicine, he was unable to leave the house for a week due to muscle aches, nausea, and a low-grade fever.
In this condition, it was impossible for him to go to work, so he had no choice but to take leave. Fortunately, even taking sudden leave was approved, allowing him to rest fully.
Even a week later, he still didn’t feel well, but at least the fever had subsided significantly compared to the beginning, and the muscle aches were less severe. It seemed he could return to work tomorrow.
“Need…to eat.”
Perhaps due to feeling unwell, his appetite was much worse lately. However, since childhood his mother had drilled into him that ‘you need to eat well, especially when sick’, so he tried his best to keep eating.
He shuffled to the fridge and rummaged through it, but with no grocery shopping, there was nothing suitable to eat. At least there was still rice, so it seemed he could only make plain rice porridge.
As he was transferring rice into a pot with a rice cup, there was a sudden, violent pounding on the front door.
Bang bang bang!
Seon-won jumped in fright at the thunderous noise, his eyes widening as he hunched his shoulders. What was that? Holding his breath in fear, a familiar voice followed.
“Yoon Seon-won!”
“…My lord?”
It was Do-gyeom’s voice.
He thought some strange person had mistakenly come to the wrong place, but to be addressed as ‘my lord’. Do-gyeom had never visited so brazenly without any notice.
Unintentionally freezing in place from the surprise, Do-gyeom’s voice came again from outside.
“I know you’re in there, so open up before I break down the door.”
“J-Just a moment!”
Why was he threatening to break down the door suddenly? Even as a sturdy alpha, he shouldn’t be strong enough to destroy a perfectly fine front door, but he was a man fully capable of hiring people or using money instead.
Seon-won hurriedly opened the front door, and through the cracked opening, Do-gyeom’s fierce face appeared.
Startled by the terrifying look he had never seen before, Seon-won reflexively almost closed the door again. But Do-gyeom wedged his hand through the gap and forcefully swung the door wide open.
With his look of immediately wanting to rush in, Seon-won was flustered and his voice trembled.
“Wh-What brings you here…?”
“Are you kidding me right now? I said we’d talk about that night later, so what’s the problem?”
“Huh? What does that…?”
“The reason for your leave, you put down family travel. But when I contacted your mother, she said that never happened. So what is this? Were you trying to run away like that?”
“R-Run away…?”
Seon-won’s eyes widened at the unexpected words.