God of Assassination, Become the Strongest Healer - chapter 16

Three days later, Estelle was breathing heavily. A few drops of water from her cup dripped down her thin wrist. She wanted to throw the water in that annoying person’s face, but she was too weak to do it. Outside the window, she heard the maids saying, “My lord, you’ve worked hard today too.”

Three days later.

“Hah… hah…”

Drip.

A little bit of water left in the cup slid down Estelle’s skinny wrist. If she had the strength, she would’ve thrown all the water in the cup at that detestable face, but she didn’t have enough power to make it all splash.

“Master, thank you for your hard work today.”

The voices of the maids drifted in from beyond the window. She pulled back the curtains and looked outside, where she could see Pagan’s back fading away, flanked by rows of female priests and shamans bidding him farewell.

Screech.

If only Pagan had scowled even a little after being drenched with water, she wouldn’t have been this angry. His calm acceptance of her fury, like a snow-capped peak, only made her feel more miserable.

“Please take care, and we are always grateful for your great grace, Master.”

Seeing the unusually respectful villagers, Estelle unknowingly bit her lip. As time passed, the villagers’ attitude toward Pagan had only grown more and more respectful, and Estelle couldn’t stand it.

Of course, she knew why the villagers were groveling like that to the jerk. But knowing that didn’t make her anger toward Pagan any less.

“How can he talk like he knows anything when he’s never been in pain like I have?”

Maybe Estelle’s hostility toward Pagan was a sign of jealousy toward someone as strong as him, someone who would never have to go through pain.

“Huff… huff…“

At that moment, when Estelle was crying alone in the room, hugging her knees, she felt a soft warmth on her shoulder.

“Hey, why are you crying, Estelle?”

“Ramute! Huh… weren’t you supposed to go with that arrogant outsider… I mean, Lord Claudius?”

“Yeah. I was going to, but I ended up staying here for a bit because I really wanted to talk to you.”

“Ahh! Ramute! That tickles.”

When Ramute’s warm beak touched her cheek, Estelle couldn’t help but laugh, her first smile in a while. And once she saw Estelle’s mood brighten a little, Ramute carefully asked.

Estelle, I heard you splashed water on Pagan’s face today.

Y-Yes! How did you know, Ramute? I mean, that’s not… um…

It’s okay. I’m not mad at you, so you don’t have to look so worried.

I-I didn’t mean to… it was… an accident…

An accident? Hmm, I don’t think it was just an accident. This isn’t the first time you’ve ignored Pagan and acted mean to him.

Ramute’s voice was still kind, but Estelle looked scared.

How did she find out? Did that annoying kid go and tell her? No, the kid promised he wouldn’t say anything about what happened during the treatment. “Just so you know, Pagan hasn’t said anything about what happened between you two. I hope you don’t misjudge him.” “Then how does Ramute know…?”

“Hmm? It’s a secret. If I really wanted to know, I have my ways, you know? Hehe.”

Estelle, not knowing about the observer named Belzekiel, couldn’t help but feel confused. She hadn’t expected Ramute to press her about it, and her face turned even paler. Ramute gently rubbed her cheek with his beak and said:

“Estelle, like I said, I’m not blaming you. I know how much pain you’ve been through.”

“Ramute… sniff…”

“But there’s something you need to know before it’s too late, which is why I came here today. So, could you please listen to me for a moment?”

A pure white background, with dark red stains scattered all over the center.

“Isn’t this… blood?”

“Yeah, it’s blood.”

Even Estelle, who didn’t have much experience, could tell right away. The stains were obvious. After briefly looking over the piece of cloth, which was probably dozens of layers thick, Ramute spoke in a low voice.

“To be more exact, it’s blood that Pagan has been vomiting from the Vessel of Will over the past month and a half.”

“…!”

As soon as Estelle heard the word “blood,” her face turned completely pale.

In Estelle’s mind, Pagan was someone with an unyielding spirit, someone who never bent or wavered, even at a young age—like an immovable rock high above, looking down on her.

But… Pagan vomited blood? Every day?

It was hard for Estelle to believe.

“Blood? Ramute, what are you talking about? That brat is bleeding from the Vessel of Will? What do you mean by that?”

“So he never told you, huh?”

Ramute closed his eyes and sighed.

“I thought it might be because he asked not to say anything to you, but I didn’t think he wouldn’t say a word about it even to you himself.”

As Ramute sighed, heat flared up along his tail feathers, and his voice, filled with emotions as hot as that heat, spoke again.

“You know Pagan visits the Vessel of Will every night before checking on your condition, right? 

Sure! Here’s a more informal translation:

“Yeah, there’s been a bit of an issue, so it’s tough to move Orpheus’s records around. That’s why I go there every day to grab what I need.” 

—Estelle, listen up. Every time Pagan goes into the Hall of Will, which is every night, he ends up throwing up a lot of blood. 

“So why is that kid bleeding…?” 

—You know the Hall of Will got messed up during the sea monster attack, right? You and the other folks on the island probably think it was just the outer walls that got damaged. But the truth is, the shock caused some serious internal damage too. Because of that, Pagan can’t get into Orpheus’s record room the usual way anymore.

Estelle realized that the outsider kid goes to the Hall of Will every day, but since the entrance is broken, he’s finding a different way to get in. This method is harming Pagan’s body, causing him to vomit blood. Estelle was shocked and instinctively covered her mouth with her hand, forgetting she was wearing a mask. She had no idea he was suffering like this every night.

Wait a second! Lamute-sama, you told me last time, didn’t you? That anyone trying to enter the Hall of Will, like Claudius, will have their willpower tested?

Lamute calmly said it was Orpheus’s decision, making Estelle look worried. Normally, anyone facing the Hall of Will would have to go through a tough time, but Pagan was dealing with an even tougher trial every day. Estelle had believed Pagan could manage some stress, which is why she brought him there, but the pressure he was under was much greater than she anticipated.He’s going through a lot more pain than most people do every day. It hurts so much that blood seeps through the fabric. Lamute didn’t want to make the girl feel bad. But he couldn’t just stand by and watch her act out without realizing what Pagan is dealing with. So, he turned to Estelle and said: To help you get better.

Ah…”

—Though I don’t know the pain Pagan is feeling, seeing such a composed child panting on his knees, it’s probably suffering so extreme that it’s hard to describe with words.

“You should’ve stopped him!”

Estelle couldn’t help but yell out.

She had been harsh with Pagan, but before she got sick, she was the kindest child.

The despair from her long illness and jealousy towards Pagan often made her say cruel things, but Estelle was never the kind of person who could watch others suffer without feeling anything.

“Lamute-sama, you should’ve stopped him! How could you just watch him vomit blood every day like that? You should’ve made him stop, even if you had to force him!”

—You really think I wouldn’t have stopped him?

“Then…”
—I’ve tried stopping him. I tried on the first day, the second day, and the day after that. Even today, I told him to stop, but he just keeps repeating that you can’t know about this and refuses to stop, no matter what.
Shiver.
Even though I was wrapped in the sheets, my arms and legs started to tremble.
[Even if you don’t believe in my abilities, I hope you’ll at least trust my will. I know I must look unreliable to you, but I really do want to save you.]
The words Pagan had casually said before stabbed into my chest like a dagger.
I thought it was just the boastful words of a naive kid who didn’t understand what pain was, but the child, Claudius, who was younger than me, was enduring unimaginable pain just to say those words.
—Pagan is twelve this year. One year younger than you. And to be honest, if I had known that Pagan would have to endure such immense pain to cure you, I never would’ve brought him here. That would be too cruel for a twelve-year-old.
Until now, I’d always complained about the pain I was going through with Pagan, but since the treatment started, I’ve never once experienced pain so intense that I vomited blood.
But Pagan goes through that pain every single day…
—Do you know what Pagan cares about most? Before he leaves the Hall of Will to meet you, he makes sure to tidy up his clothes.

Pagan warns everyone not to find out about the pain he is enduring. The priests and priestesses are very kind to him because they know he is suffering a lot to help their saintess. They feel very grateful and emotional about what he is doing for her.

Estelle, I know you’re going through a really tough time right now. But you’re not alone. There’s a young boy on the other side of this dark place, bravely running to you. He just wants to take your hand before you decide to stop trying to get through. If Pagan had heard this, he might have thought, “That’s not really true. Thanks for saying that, but it’s not what I want.” Luckily, Pagan isn’t here.

“We’ve only known each other for less than two months, and he’s doing all this for me…”
—Yeah. That kid has the “Heart of the Healer,” which is exactly like Orpheus’s. Well, maybe his courage is even a little better than Orpheus’s.
“But… but I yell and say bad things… I even spilled water on my face… Lamute-sama, what should I do? What am I supposed to do?”
A deep sense of guilt overwhelmed me, and it felt like the world was closing in.

What should I do? How can I look at his face again?
—Estelle, if you’re okay with it, how about taking off your mask and looking in a mirror?
Lamute suggested with a gentle voice.
He knew that Estelle hadn’t looked at herself in the mirror for a long time.
As her condition worsened, facing the discolored face would have been a pain worse than death for a young girl.
But Lamute encouraged her to be brave, and relying on the surge of courage, Estelle impulsively looked at her bare face in the mirror for the first time in a long while.
“Ah! Lamute-sama… Lamute-sama!”
—Congratulations, Estelle. There’s still a long way to go, but I believe you’ll do well.
Estelle’s voice, as she looked into the mirror, trembled with a different tone than before.
Of course, her skin was still stained with various colors, and it felt rough, like touching tree bark, but there was improvement.
It was so faint that you wouldn’t notice unless you looked closely, but it was definitely progress.
The result Pagan had achieved by vomiting blood once again made Estelle cry.
“What should I do, Lamute-sama? What should I do? I… I didn’t know anything… Ugh…!”
Overcome with emotion, Estelle finally broke down in tears.

Estelle felt a mix of great happiness and heavy guilt that stopped her from truly celebrating. Lamute told her it was okay to be honest with Pagan about her feelings, and that Pagan would understand. He opened his wings and gently wiped her tears, reminding her that Pagan was Claudius’s child and had a special purpose to fulfill.

The next day.

‘It’s clear now that Orpheus and the ancient kingdom are connected. But there’s no clue that can give me any concrete details, so it’s driving me crazy.’

Even as he climbed the stairs to the saintess’s bedroom, his mind was full of thoughts about Orpheus.

Filling his head with other thoughts before a patient consultation wasn’t ideal for a healer, but he couldn’t help it.

The mystery, which seemed so close yet always slipped farther away, wouldn’t leave his mind.

‘Lately, I’m getting used to the pressure a little bit. I wish I could get more clues, even if the pain got worse…’

Thinking about it, it had always been like that.

Body and mind.

If one had to suffer, he always chose his body.

The pain inflicted on the flesh shouldn’t be underestimated, but it was nothing compared to the thirst for knowledge caused by an unquenchable curiosity.

‘Should I just tell her to go away? Or will she pull the covers over her head and try not to show her face?’

Having reached Estelle’s bedroom, he turned the doorknob, anticipating her usual reaction, and greeted her in a cheerful voice.

Click.

“Hey. I noticed the moonlight was especially nice on the way here. Did you get a chance to look at it?”